Fuck.

Sometimes nowadays i feel like i just don't want to do anything at all. Just do almost nothing for hours hanging in front of the computer, watching television programs and lazing around singing. But i can't.

There's work to be done, things to be done, plus i have to play pool. Sometimes i just want everything to stop, so i can have all the time to myself to enjoy life, to stop and look around.

Or maybe I'm just finding a excuse to think of you.

Let my tired heart go.

Just when i thought time had prepared me enough to go on, those thoughts of you keep taunting me. I don't have much i can remember of you, i can only remember your lips on mine, how your skin smells like, the glow on your face whenever my favourite smile spreads slowly upon your face. I can remember the smell of your hair, the curve of your neck, how you move when i run my hands down your waist and lock them behind you, how my love for you drives me crazy.

I've always wished that i could do something, something more than kissing, something more than loving, more than caring. Something more than everything i could do to make you see, how much you mean to me. Maybe then you'll understand, my world, my home, is wherever you are, wherever you go. Where i belong, is inside your heart.

So when you can't stay where you truly belong, do you know how that feels?

Hustler meets hustler.

I thought i was on my way to becoming a hustler until i met Bronson today. The definition of the word "hustler" was redefined. Never noticed him much, but i faced a beast today and got took down 9-4. Every single journey to the table i found myself either not being able to see the ball I'm supposed to hit or there is nothing to develop due to a extremely tough shot. The four racks were all runs from his dry break or my break. Other than that there was no chance to exhibit any of my standard. What a player.

I should do that to every next opponent i play.

Saltwater on my lips.

You were everything i wanted and so fucking much more. You are what i depend on when I'm lost, when I'm tired, when i no longer want to hustle and bustle through my life. You're what i look at and think of, because when i think of you, the pain is gone. But its time i faced these problems by myself, because this excruciating love is so hard to sever and i shouldn't depend on it any more. I feel so tired right now, but i miss you, i think of you and its gone. You are, no, were, my everything.

S.

To you, maybe in another time and another place and another lifetime, we could've had a love of a lifetime. Maybe we barely knew each other for 3 hours, but we both know we had what each other was looking for. Thanks to yoona whom i'm not over, and many other things we both knew couldn't work out, this is where we go our separate ways. If we could be, in another life, i hope i remember, so i could show you how love, MY love, is like.

If life was a book, you'll be bookmarked so I can never forget someone special like you.

Darson Blue.

Darson Blue is a pub i went with my dad just now and I've just reached home from there. It's a nice place with a lousy pool table but nice people and lousy game machines but nice bar girls. I almost got hooked up by my father's friends' sabotaging when they realized i was single. But i must say, the girls were so beautiful and nice. If i was high, god knows what would've happened.

Lesson learned: Make sure you and your father don't get drunk at the same time when going to drink together.

Goal.

I aim to be a hustler when i get older. Not a coach, not a tournament frequent, not just a national player but a hustler. Let's hope i get there soon. From today onwards every time i play pool i will pull out almost all my stops. I hope that it would help me improve in a faster way. To all those who have shown me support in pool, thank you! I will continue to work hard and improve.